The Single Girl's Most Critical Accessory

No, it isn't the chestnut brown Mac lipgloss, the Gucci fanny pack or Beyonce's freakum dress (although these ought to be definite accessories in your closet). You know a single girl has to always put her best face forward and have those secret weapon pieces in her wardrobe that if circumstances call for it, she can whip it out. My latest secret weapon are my new 5 inch black suede thigh-high boots. Yes 5 inches! They are fierce and I am a tall diva in them. I broke them in last weekend and they worked a number.

I digressed a little :) BUT I realized that for a long time, I have been missing the one crucial accessory that every single woman must have... The Boy BFF.

Lately, after my girl told me she has two Boy BFFs (greedy), I realized that I haven't had one in some time. My first Boy BFF was in high school. Back then, there weren't called "Boy BFFs", he was just a label-less item, but nevertheless, he was THE necessary accessory during that time. High school, especially amongst girls, can be a brutal time so he was definitely my sounding board. We used to hang out, talk about relationships, give each other advice and contrary to popular high school belief and rumor, there was not an ounce of chemistry between us. He was just that cool friend.

The Boy BFF is critical for a single girl because we need that male, no-nonsense, the non-"woo woo woo", prescence to bring the yin to our girls' yang. As my girl attempted to plan ice-skating as the first date with her latest new guy, her Boy BFF tersely responded, "And what heterosexual male did you consult with that approved ice skating?" Um, needless to say, my girl's first date will be the Hawks game... :) The Boy BFF will let you know when to love 'em or leave 'em alone. He can give that male perspective on dating, how to approach a matter or let you know when you've been "had". As a male friend of mine put it, "I can spot THAT dude because I AM THAT dude". LOL!

Now as important as my girls are, they only offer a one-sided perspective on dating and relationships and honestly, they are just as clueless as I am. It is like we are playing on a team with no offensive coordinator who has the play-calling expertise for each down--- You gotta know the other team's moves. And your girls, bless their hearts, can analyze a situation down to its atomical particles. We can talk (and I have done this) for 2 hours on a 30 second voicemail from a man that says, "Hey... Just wanted to see what's going on, hadn't talk to you in a while. Hope all is well." ---You'd be amazed at the dissertation we could create on this. Your girls mean well, but they have the potential to lead you to thinking and doing some hilarious things, co-sign on it and then later say, "that may not have been the wisest move". The Boy BFF will not even go there with you because frankly, they don't have the patience and to them, it's an exercise in futility. It is not hard facts, a problem to be solved and men like to solve something and be done. Cut throat but a good trait.

BUT! Boy BFFs have their limits too. Boy BFFs don't have intuition or at least don't know how to use it. Your girls will have that "gut feeling", when there aren't any hard and fast facts on a guy's behavior or you feel and know that something in the universe has shifted... My girl and I spotted a man's interest in her before he even knew he had it! Boy BFFs aren't equipped for this. And Boy BFFs can NEVER tell you or sense when a chic is doing some 'ol underhanded s***. You and your girls can sniff out that chic's agenda before she enters a room and utters a word, but your Boy BFF will say something foolish like, "She's seems like a cool girl"... Whatever, I got her playbook on the shelf at home.

So my quest began for a Boy BFF and after vetting 3 guys, I found him. I told him that he would be my hard-nose go-to guy for advice when I need it, but I reassured him that he will not, shan't not advise me on the latest haircut choice or this winter's fashion trend as those opinions are for my Gay Boy BFF, next season's accessory item. :) You might think I am slightly nuts but I think I am on to something because another girlfriend is thinking about getting a Boy BFF too. I told her it's the hottest item out, we can't be our fly-est without one; the women will want to know our secret and the men will be on us to their own surprise....

The Boy BFF... as critical as my 5-inch black suede thigh-high boots. If you don't already have 'em, it's a definitely must get! ---SP